In the first part of the book, Brand shares his personal story of addiction and recovery. He describes his early experiences with drugs and alcohol, and how they quickly became a central focus of his life. He also shares the moment that he realized he needed to get sober, and the challenges he faced in the early stages of his recovery. Throughout this section of the book, Brand is honest and vulnerable about his struggles, and his writing is both engaging and relatable.

The second part of the book focuses on the 12-step program of recovery, which is a central aspect of many addiction treatment programs. Brand provides a thorough explanation of the 12 steps, including their origins and how they can be applied to recovery from addiction. He also discusses the importance of finding a sponsor, attending meetings, and working through the steps with a support group.

One of the strengths of this section of the book is the way that Brand makes the 12 steps accessible to a wider audience. While the program can seem intimidating or confusing to those who are unfamiliar with it, Brand provides a clear and concise explanation of each step, and uses examples from his own life to illustrate how they can be applied to addiction recovery.

The third part of the book focuses on the practical aspects of recovery, including mindfulness, meditation, and exercise. Brand discusses the importance of self-care in recovery, and provides guidance on how to develop a daily routine that supports sobriety. He also emphasizes the importance of giving back to others, and encourages readers to find ways to contribute to their communities.

One of the strengths of this section of the book is the way that Brand emphasizes the importance of holistic wellness in recovery. He recognizes that addiction is a complex issue that requires a multifaceted approach to treatment, and provides guidance on how to develop a well-rounded recovery plan.

Throughout the book, Brand’s writing style is engaging and humorous, which makes the book both enjoyable and accessible. He is able to convey complex ideas in a way that is easy to understand, and his personal anecdotes add a level of authenticity and relatability to the book.

One potential weakness of the book is that it is largely focused on the 12-step program of recovery, which may not be suitable for everyone. While the program has helped many people achieve sobriety, it is not the only approach to addiction treatment, and some individuals may require a different type of support.

Another potential weakness of the book is the way that Brand sometimes comes across as preachy or self-righteous. While his passion for recovery is evident throughout the book, there are moments where he seems to be dictating what readers should do, rather than providing guidance and support.

Despite these potential weaknesses, “Recovery: Freedom from Our Addictions” is a valuable resource for anyone struggling with addiction. Brand’s personal story of addiction and recovery is both compelling and relatable, and his guidance on the 12-step program of recovery and practical aspects of sobriety is thorough and accessible. Overall, the book is an honest and inspiring account of one person’s journey from addiction to recovery, and a valuable guide for anyone looking to make positive changes in their life.

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The book is divided into six parts, each covering a different aspect of the 30-day program. Part one provides an overview of the program, and includes a pre-assessment quiz to help readers determine the severity of their drinking problem. Part two focuses on creating a vision for the future, and includes exercises to help readers identify their goals and motivations for cutting back or quitting drinking.

Part three of the book provides practical strategies for changing habits and beliefs around drinking. This includes techniques for coping with cravings, dealing with triggers, and developing new habits that support sobriety. Part four focuses on emotional healing, and includes exercises to help readers address underlying emotional issues that may contribute to their drinking.

Part five of the book focuses on developing a support system, and includes strategies for building a network of supportive people and resources. This includes tips for communicating with family and friends about sobriety, as well as guidance on finding and participating in support groups.

Finally, part six of the book provides guidance for maintaining sobriety after the 30-day program is complete. This includes strategies for dealing with setbacks and challenges, as well as tips for living a fulfilling and healthy life without alcohol.

One of the strengths of “The 30-Day Sobriety Solution” is the comprehensive nature of the program. The book provides a wide range of tools and techniques to help readers achieve their sobriety goals. The program is designed to be flexible, allowing readers to customize the program to their individual needs and preferences.

Another strength of the book is the focus on building a support system. Canfield and Andrews emphasize the importance of seeking out support from family, friends, and professionals, and provide guidance on how to do so. This support system is a key component of the program, and can help readers stay motivated and on track throughout the 30-day journey and beyond.

Additionally, the book includes real-life stories of individuals who have successfully completed the program, which adds a level of authenticity and inspiration to the book. These stories provide hope and motivation for readers who may be struggling with their own addiction.

One potential weakness of the book is the emphasis on the 30-day timeframe. While this timeframe may work well for some individuals, it may not be suitable for those with more severe addiction issues. For these individuals, a longer and more intensive program may be necessary.

Another potential weakness of the book is the lack of guidance on accessing professional help. While the authors acknowledge that some individuals may require professional help, they do not provide guidance on how to access these resources. For those with more severe addiction issues, professional help may be necessary to achieve sobriety.

Despite these potential weaknesses, “The 30-Day Sobriety Solution” is a valuable resource for anyone looking to cut back or quit drinking alcohol. The program is comprehensive, flexible, and includes a wide range of tools and techniques to help readers achieve their goals. The focus on building a support system is particularly valuable, as it can help readers stay motivated and on track throughout the program and beyond. Overall, “The 30-Day Sobriety Solution” is a useful guide for anyone looking to make positive changes in their life and achieve sobriety.

The post “The 30-Day Sobriety Solution: How to Cut Back or Quit Drinking in the Privacy of Your Own Home” by Jack Canfield and Dave Andrews Book Review appeared first on Fuck You Alcohol.

The book is divided into three parts. The first part, “The Truth About Alcohol,” provides an overview of the effects of alcohol on the body and mind, and debunks common myths about drinking. Beck explains how alcohol addiction is a learned behavior, and that it can be unlearned by changing one’s beliefs and habits. He argues that the key to overcoming addiction is to understand the true nature of alcohol and to reprogram the subconscious mind to see it in a different light.

The second part of the book, “The Intelligent Escape Plan,” provides practical advice on how to quit drinking. Beck emphasizes the importance of setting goals and creating a plan for quitting. He provides strategies for coping with withdrawal symptoms, managing cravings, and dealing with triggers that can lead to relapse. He also discusses the importance of self-care, including exercise, healthy eating, and stress management, as a way to support recovery.

The third part of the book, “The Life Beyond Alcohol,” explores the benefits of living a sober life. Beck emphasizes that quitting drinking can lead to improved health, better relationships, and increased happiness and fulfillment. He encourages readers to focus on the positive aspects of sobriety, rather than dwelling on the sacrifices.

One of the strengths of Beck’s approach is his focus on the subconscious mind. He argues that addiction is driven by deeply ingrained beliefs and habits, which can only be changed by reprogramming the subconscious. He provides practical exercises and techniques for changing the way the mind perceives alcohol, such as visualization, affirmations, and self-hypnosis. This approach is particularly effective for those who have struggled to quit drinking through willpower alone.

Another strength of the book is the author’s personal experience with addiction. Beck is able to relate to readers who are struggling with addiction, and provides a sense of hope and inspiration. He shares his own struggles and triumphs, and emphasizes that recovery is possible for anyone who is willing to make a commitment to change.

One potential weakness of the book is that it may not be suitable for those with severe alcohol addiction or who require medical intervention to quit drinking. Beck’s approach is geared towards those who want to quit drinking on their own, without the need for professional help. While he acknowledges that some people may require additional support, such as counseling or medication, he does not provide guidance on how to access these resources.

Another potential weakness is that Beck’s approach may not be effective for everyone. While his focus on reprogramming the subconscious mind is a powerful tool, it may not work for those who have deep-seated emotional or psychological issues that contribute to addiction. For these individuals, professional counseling or therapy may be necessary to address the underlying issues.

Despite these potential weaknesses, “Alcohol Lied to Me” is a valuable resource for anyone looking to quit drinking alcohol. Beck’s approach is practical, easy to follow, and emphasizes the importance of changing one’s beliefs and habits around alcohol. The book provides a range of tools and strategies for coping with cravings, dealing with triggers, and supporting recovery. The author’s personal experience with addiction adds a level of authenticity and empathy that makes the book relatable and inspiring. Overall, “Alcohol Lied to Me” is a useful guide for anyone who wants to break free from alcohol addiction and live a happier, healthier life.

The post “Alcohol Lied to Me: The Intelligent Way to Escape Alcohol Addiction” by Craig Beck Book Review appeared first on Fuck You Alcohol.

The book is structured in three parts. The first part, “The Truth about Alcohol,” aims to change readers’ beliefs about alcohol. Vale argues that alcohol is not an essential part of life, and that it does not provide any real benefits. He debunks common myths about alcohol, such as the idea that it helps people relax or that it is a social lubricant. He also explores the physical effects of alcohol, including how it affects the brain, body, and emotions.

The second part of the book, “The Easy way Process,” is where Vale provides the steps to quitting drinking. He encourages readers to approach quitting with an open mind and to be willing to let go of any preconceived notions about alcohol. He explains how to use positive thinking, visualization, and affirmations to change one’s mindset and beliefs about alcohol. Vale also provides practical strategies for coping with cravings and dealing with social situations where alcohol is present.

The third and final part of the book, “The Life-Changing Benefits of Being a Non-Drinker,” explores the many benefits of quitting drinking. Vale emphasizes that quitting alcohol can lead to improved health, better relationships, increased productivity, and a greater sense of self-worth. He encourages readers to focus on the positive aspects of being a non-drinker, rather than dwelling on the sacrifices.

One of the strengths of Vale’s approach is his focus on the psychological and emotional factors that contribute to addiction. He argues that drinking is often a way to cope with stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions. He encourages readers to explore the underlying reasons for their drinking, and to develop new coping strategies that do not involve alcohol. Vale also emphasizes the importance of self-care, including exercise, healthy eating, and getting enough rest, as a way to improve overall well-being and reduce the desire to drink.

Vale’s approach is practical and easy to follow. He provides clear steps for changing one’s mindset and developing new habits, without relying on willpower alone. The use of visualization exercises and positive affirmations is particularly effective, as it helps readers to overcome the fear and uncertainty that often accompanies quitting. Vale also provides practical strategies for dealing with social situations where alcohol is present, such as finding alternative activities to do with friends or learning to say no to offers of alcohol.

One potential weakness of the book is that it may not be suitable for those with severe alcohol addiction or who require medical intervention to quit drinking. Vale’s approach is geared towards those who want to quit drinking on their own, without the need for professional help. While he acknowledges that some people may require additional support, such as counseling or medication, he does not provide guidance on how to access these resources.

Another potential weakness is that Vale’s approach may not be effective for everyone. While his focus on changing one’s mindset and beliefs about alcohol is a powerful tool, it may not work for those who have deep-seated emotional or psychological issues that contribute to addiction. For these individuals, professional counseling or therapy may be necessary to address the underlying issues.

Despite these potential weaknesses, “Kick the Drink…Easily!” is a valuable resource for anyone looking to quit drinking alcohol. Vale’s approach is practical, easy to follow, and emphasizes the importance of changing one’s mindset and beliefs about alcohol. The book provides a range of tools and strategies for coping with cravings, dealing with social situations

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The book is divided into 12 chapters, each of which covers a different aspect of drinking and quitting. Carr starts by debunking common myths about alcohol, such as the idea that alcohol is a “social lubricant” or that it helps people relax. He argues that these beliefs are perpetuated by society and the alcohol industry to keep people drinking, but that they are not rooted in fact. This sets the tone for the rest of the book, which challenges readers to question their assumptions about alcohol and the role it plays in their lives.

Throughout the book, Carr emphasizes the importance of changing one’s mindset and beliefs about alcohol in order to quit successfully. He encourages readers to view alcohol not as a pleasure, but as a trap that keeps them in a cycle of addiction. He also stresses the importance of focusing on the benefits of quitting, rather than the sacrifices, which can help motivate readers to make lasting change.

One of the key techniques Carr uses in the book is the use of visualization exercises. He encourages readers to visualize themselves as non-drinkers, imagining how they will feel and the benefits they will experience. This technique is designed to help readers overcome the fear and uncertainty that often accompanies quitting, and to replace it with a sense of excitement and anticipation about the future.

Carr also spends a lot of time discussing the psychological and emotional factors that contribute to alcohol addiction. He argues that many people turn to alcohol as a way to cope with stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions. He provides strategies for dealing with these underlying issues, such as learning to accept and process emotions, rather than trying to numb them with alcohol.

Another important aspect of Carr’s approach is his focus on the social and cultural factors that contribute to drinking. He argues that society puts immense pressure on people to drink, and that this pressure can be difficult to resist. He provides practical advice for dealing with social situations where alcohol is present, such as learning to say no and finding alternative activities to replace drinking.

Overall, “The Easy Way to Stop Drinking” is a unique and effective guide for quitting alcohol. Carr’s approach is simple, straightforward, and rooted in common sense. He emphasizes the importance of changing one’s mindset and beliefs about alcohol, rather than relying on willpower alone. By providing practical strategies for dealing with both the physical and psychological aspects of addiction, Carr gives readers the tools they need to make lasting change. The book is accessible and engaging, making it a great resource for anyone looking to quit drinking and reclaim their life.

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This Naked Mind Review

This book makes a lot of claims out of the gate.

Spontaneous sobriety. No cravings. No loss. No 12-steps. No therapy. Just put up the book and put down the bottle.

Actually – she doesn’t even say put down the bottle. In fact, quite the opposite. She says to continue to drink while you read the book. I mean – don’t read the book drunk – but don’t go cold turkey while you are on the journey.

As you start the book, the table of content shows ‘Liminal Points’ added in throughout the book. A liminal point is defined as a stimulus strong enough to produce a physiological or psychological response. Basically, it’s the moments in the book where something actually changes within you.

And with liminal points topic such as ‘are we really drinking for taste’ and ‘does drinking help me have better sex’ and the one that hit me the hardest ‘Is alcohol vital to a social life’, you will start to see quickly that this book will hit home and challenge the paradigm that you have held for so long with drinking.

But what got me hooked was the preface of the book. Here is a blurb of it for your enjoyment:

3:33 a.m. I wake up at the same time every night. I briefly wonder if that is supposed to mean something. Probably not, probably just a coincidence. I know what’s coming, and I brace myself. The usual thoughts begin to surface. I try to piece the previous evening together, attempting to count my drinks. I count five glasses of wine, and then the memories grow fuzzy. I know I had a few more, but I’ve now lost count. I wonder how anyone can drink so much. I know I can’t go on like this. I start to worry about my health, beginning the well-trodden road of fear and recrimination: What were you thinking? Don’t you care about anything? Anyone? How will it feel if you end up with cancer? It will serve you right. What about the kids? Can’t you stop for the kids? Or Brian? They love you. There’s no good reason why, but they do. Why are you so weak? So stupid? If I can just make myself see the horror of how far I’ve fallen, maybe I can regain control. Next come the vows, my promises to myself to do things differently tomorrow. To fix this. Promises I never keep.

This was me. This exact scenario was me. 330a nearly every single night. Angry that I ‘did it again’ and not knowing how to quit. The kids…what about the kids?!?

The book does a great job about giving the physical pieces of drinking, as well as the mental pieces of drinking. But there is one aspect that really did well for me, and that was the conscious vs. unconscious mind as it relates to drinking.

You see – I am one of those positive thinking mindset is everything type of guys. My life changed when I read The Secret and believe that life is a divine journey meant for us.

But I never applied this to my drinking, or my attempts to quit drinking. Once I read this book, I realized that it is possible to quit using the law of attraction – or more basic – being able to control your mind in the right way and use the natural ability of how our brains work to quit drinking.

But I believe the best part of this book was the real no nonsense talk on what alcohol is doing to your body – and your life. No matter where you are on the drinking spectrum, Alcohol is only taking from you. Annie Grace does a great job about making these subjects serious, but also relatable. I think in the addiction arena, there are too many ‘experts’ who studied addiction in school, but never have been on a 2 week bender wondering if this is the bender that will actual end them.

There is a power in knowing someone has been to the dark spaces you have been.

How This Naked Mind Helped Me

This book was the first take that actually showed me what alcohol was: A drug. It does no good. It takes and takes. And everything I thought it did for me was a lie. It doesn’t make me happy. It doesn’t help me sleep. I don’t drink it for the taste. I don’t need it to be social (this was a big one for me). It only took from me.

It took my health. It took my sleep. It took my true personality. It took my time.

Time – that is the worst thing that it took. I got everything else back in my life. My health. My sleep. My personality. But I cannot get back those hours – literally house of my life back wasted to the drug.

But I can prevent it from taking anymore in the future.

Can This Naked Mind Help You?

This Naked Mind was not the pivot point of me dropping the bottle for good. In fact – to be quite honest – I don’t know if I had that one moment. But what this book did do for me – and can do for you – is to call out what alcohol truly does – and does not – do in your life.

Awareness is the first step. You don’t know what you don’t know. You can continue to stick your head in the sand on your drinking, or you can take steps toward bringing what it really does into your awareness. The choice is up to you. But I think giving this book a try is well worth it if you are seriously about telling alcohol to F*ck off in your life.

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Pretty simple right? But if we did into that a bit more – we can very easily start to see how the pain and pleasure principle within your drinking habits is moving your further down the rabbit hole, and how reversing that way of thinking could be the ticket to long term sobriety.

First – a few more concepts to understand about the pain/pleasure principle.

1. The pain/pleasure principle has some role to play in every decision that you make. That extra cup of coffee? The pleasure of the warm beverage and the pain of the sleepiness without the caffeine. Missing that workout? The pain of no progress, but the pleasure of no pain. Asking that girl out? The pleasure of meeting Mrs. Right, and the pain of being alone. Quite literally in some capacity it is in every decision that you make.
2. Avoiding Pain is a bigger driver than getting pleasure. There has been numerous studies done that people are more afraid to lose money, than they are to get money. The pain of losing money is a bigger driver than the pleasure of getting more money.
3. Your perception is your reality. Your pain is different than my pain. Your pleasure is different than my pleasure. This concept is not a one size fits all – it is unique to each and every individual – which will be important as we start to talk about how this concept can help you kick the drinking habit.

Understanding that this pain and pleasure principle is working in your life – whether you consciously know it or not – is important. Think about the decisions that you have made over the past week. What was driving those decisions? At the core – if you peel back enough layers – you will find that the decision and habits throughout your life are based on the avoiding pain, or gaining pleasure.

Every single one.

So now that we are aware – let’s dig into how this applies to drinking:

The Pain and Pleasure Principle for Quitting Alcohol

This concept quite literally was one of the main drivers for me in getting sober. It wasn’t overnight, but as time when on, and I drove this concept into my brain, I slowly just stopped drinking – avoiding pain – and moved to sobriety – gaining pleasure.

But I didn’t start off this way.

I, like you probably, initially found drinking incredibly pleasurable. I mean – cmon – the magic elixir that made me funnier, made stress disappear, and made the whole world seem to tick just a touch slower. It was euphoric. Total pleasure. For that moment in time where I caught that spot – that buzz where you can sit and relax and let the world just spin around you – getting to that spot was amazing.

Until it went away. Then the hangover set in. The headache. The upset stomach. The shitty ass sleep. The high heart rate. The high blood pressure. The anxiety – OH the anxiety hits during the come down. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t think straight. I couldn’t work out effectively. I couldn’t work effectively. I could do anything really. This was pain. Completely painful. And I wanted to avoid this at all cost. SO what did I do? Read the concept above. I did what we all do all the time: I did what needed to be done to avoid the pain, and increase pleasure.

So I drank again.

Instantly, here comes the rush of pleasure. That beautiful dopamine hit. Hitting that spot. The fun times. The laughing. The relaxation. The numbing of the mind when things just don’t go right and you just don’t want to think about anything for a couple of hours. That few turns into a few to many – and here comes that pain.

Again with the headache. Stomach issues. Not sleeping. Blood shot eyes. Extra shot of caffeine to make it through the day. Shortness of breathe. Sweats. Shakes. Anxiety – FUCK more anxiety. This time worst. Panic attacks for not reason. Pain – how does it end?

With more drinks. That is how it ends. So out comes the bottle yet again to get away from the pain, and get to that pleasure spot one more time.

Needless to say, that above cycle is something that you probably are used to. I know I was. For YEARS – I was going through that cycle. Sometimes it was a few days cycle. Sometimes it was a few weeks. Most of the time it was daily. And it starts taking it’s toll.

The painful bouts get more dark. More heavy. More painful. The pleasure bouts don’t really get more pleasurable – they stay about the same. But you come up from a lower low every time, the perception (remember – pain / pleasure is about YOUR perception) of the pleasure seems to increase – even through it really doesn’t. You just came from a more painful place.

This was a cycle I had a very hard time breaking. I listened to a Tony Robbins youtube video on the pain and pleasure principle and started really looking at my own drinking. I know that I had drinking on the pleasure side, and bring sober on the pain side. Naturally, this led me to not stay sober very long, as I tried to avoid the pain, and increase my drinking as I tried to increase my pleasure.

This is the backward systems.

While on a walk, I was listening to The Naked Mind (again) and thought: could I switch these concepts? I know that sobriety was painful, and drinking was my pleasure. Could I make drinking my pain, and sobriety my pleasure? Maybe – just maybe – if I was able to truly tell myself this story – get switch my PERCEPTION of my own pain and pleasure principle, could that help drive me to sobriety?

I mean – it couldn’t hurt. I was heading down a path toward an early grave so it can only help – or at least slow my progress.

So I tried it out. Here is what I did:

The Pain and Pleasure Principle Exercise

You may have heard this exercise before – it is quite popular especially in the quit drinking realm – but let’s do it again and apply a new twist to it.

Get out a piece of paper and fold it in half. On one side write ALCOHOL. And the other write SOBRIETY.

Next, write down all the NEGATIVE things that each one of these does for you. Then, turn that bitch over and do the same thing – but this time – what is POSITIVE.

This list needs to come from you – from the heart – from your god honest mind. No one else. Here are a few things I added to mine – this list was actually quite large – but here is a sampling:

• Negative ALCOHOL:
  • Shitty sleep.
  • Upset stomach.
  • Not remember conversations.
  • Not remembering how I went to bed.
  • Dry heaving in the morning.
  • Throwing up.
  • Sweating.
  • Anxiety – FUCK TONS of anxiety.
• Negative SOBRIETY
  • Not as fun at parties.
  • May be awkward in social situations.
  • What am I supposed to do in business meetings>
• Positive ALCOHOL:
  • Forget about all the bullshit in the world.
  • Temporarily relieves stress from the week.
  • Helps me relax a bit.
  • Helps me fall asleep – well, I mean I pass out drunk most nights.
• Positive SOBRIETY:
  • Full nights rest
  • Actually start working out again and getting gainz.
  • Remember all I did, said, and what was said to me.
  • NO FUCKING ANXIETY.

You get the picture. Try this out. What you should have is a list of positive and negatives (pain and pleasure) of drinking and sobriety. Clearly, when I was done, I had quite a bit more of positive sobriety and negative alcohol. I then read this list every day until my brain start to truly comprehend it.

Then nearly like magic – I started associated ALCOHOL with pain, and sobriety with pleasure. I remember waking up one morning after a night of not drinking. I didn’t even think about drinking – which was random. But I woke up, clear headed, and my covers just felt so software. I just stretch out and rolled around and I remember thinking ‘Ah, is this the pleasures of sobriety?’. And that is when I started fully noticing my mindset shift. I was still drinking at the time – but drinking was legit painful. Every sip I was thinking about all the negatives.

My drinking days became less and less. My sobriety days became more and more. ON the rare drinking days, I really hit home how painful this was, and I cannot wait till I am fully sober. On my sober days, I enjoyed every fucking second of being sober. It is the best in the world.

Now – this concept has fully hit home from me. I don’t drink – because it is just too painful. In fact, I find myself almost fearful of taking another drink – for the fear of me returning to the dark pain that is alcoholism. Instead – I look forward to sobriety. The sleep – actually being rested. I am running again – not galloping around a mile and a half just to convince myself I am not a drunk. I ran 6 miles in 58 minutes the other day. Back to my old self! My heart rate is lower. My blood pressure is normal. And my anxiety? GONE. Absolutely disappeared. Things that used to trigger anxiety attacks seem to not happen. It is glorious.

I do not want to go back to the drinking – and this is honestly one of the first times in my life I can say that. And I want you to be able to say that too.

Try this exercise listed in this post. At the very least – start thinking about you pain/pleasure association with drinking. When you stop to think about – somewhere within you – there is pleasure associated with drinking and pain associated with stopping. If you can find ways to flip that paradigm, there is a beautiful life on the other side. It doesn’t happen overnight. It took quite a bit of re-reading the list, and ‘fake it till you make it’ type talk to get there. But it is SO worth it in the end.

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There I was – about to walk into the apartment where I lived with my girlfriend (now my wife) and my old sister. 4 years earlier, we lost the house that I lived in to the Cedar Fire in San Diego (2003). I was desperate to find a place to call home, so my girlfriend and I moved in with my sister. 600 sq, 2 bedrooms. I had to pay rent. For the first time in my life, I had bills. I was going to college, working full time, and still had zero money to take my girlfriend out. Like – not even pizza date nights in. Cents – I had cents in my bank account. It was so bad, I knew that I could go shopping on Sunday late afternoons, and so long as my paycheck was on time on Monday morning, and I took my lunch break to go cash my check, I would be able to afford those groceries without an overdraft fee.

I was tired. Physically, mentally, emotionally. The fire threw me back more than I ever could have dreamed. No money – actually flunked out of college, spent 2 years at a JC just to get back – and had no idea what I wanted to do for the future.

There I was – the key was in the lock, I turned in, and walked in at 4p on a random day during the week. My girlfriend was sitting on the couch watching Oprah. She had an early job that allowed her to get home by 3 or 330 (I was always jealous of that). I set my backpack down and walked into the kitchen to hopefully find some food to eat. And then I heard it:

Once you discover The Secret, you can immediately start making the life that you want. Whether it is getting out of debt, whether it is finding a more fulfilling job, even falling in love, you can have it all.

My ears perked up. I finished making my Top Ramen (the best cheap thing you can eat at 4p before dinner) and I sat down next to my wife. And story after story, people talked about how this “Secret” changed their life. They had more money. They have more time. They had more freedom. I had to know what this Secret was.

That episode had me enthralled. I went down to my latest book store, found the book, and DID NOT buy it because it was $19.95 – and I definitely did not have that sort of money. So I waited till it went on sale and bought it for $12.95 (still a stretch).

I inhaled that book. I instantly put it into practice and started seeing the effects. I got a random raise at work. The school was easier. I purchased a new car. My girlfriend and I upgraded where we lived. Live was SOARING during this book.

The biggest thing this book did was put me on a path of self-development. And it has changed the trajectory of my life.

So why tell you that story?

Because the Law of Attraction, which The Secret preaches, was an instrumental tool in my journey to quit drinking. And it can be for you too.

The Law of Attraction & Recovery

I have a real problem with AA. While I do think it works for some, the notion that you have to stand up and DECLARE that you are an alcoholic, then spend every day (one day at a time) fighting your ‘disease’ seems like a waste of time.

Our words, thoughts, and beliefs dictate our life.

Read that one more time, please.

OUR WORDS, THOUGHTS, AND BELIEFS DICTATE OUR LIFE.

So if you walk around thinking you are an alcoholic, guess what you are going to be?

If you walk around saying “I am just one drink away from being an alcoholic again”, guess what you are waiting for?

What if – just what if – you believed that you were sober. You watched what sober people do, and you mimicked that? You BELIEVED you were sober. What would you be then?

Yes, it is easier to call yourself an alcoholic and fight it every day. But where is the enjoyment in life with that?

What if you could BELIEVE that you were sober, and that you are a non-drinker, and that you could become ‘spontaneously sober’ as Annie Grace puts it?

What would you rather do?

I’ll tell you what, I’d rather think I am sober vs. thinking I am an alcoholic.

And that is why I think your words matter when you approach quitting drinking.

Words Matter

How you talk to yourself is important. You shouldn’t have to battle anything in your life – including addiction. Yes – it is a battle – one of the hardest ones I know I ever experienced in my life. But that doesn’t mean you can use self-talk, words, believes, and other mindset mechanisms to make it easier.

I cut the word “alcoholic” out of my vocabulary. If throughout this site, you will very rarely see it used. In my early stages of quitting I used “heavy drinker”. Alcoholism is too negative. Then I started working on “light drinker”, then “non-drinker” – I even don’t like the word sober. Slowly but surely, my habits started to change based on my words. It started to become normal to hear myself talk about being a non-drinker, and soon after – it simply disappeared.

Now – this approach may not work for everyone. But I urge you to keep trying. Try everything. Keep believing that there is a way and that there is more for you to be, do and have. Start thinking of yourself as a sober person, instead of a recovering alcoholic. What activities would you do? How would you sleep at night? How would you wake up? How would you live? Embrace those feelings, not the feelings of forcing yourself and taking it ‘day by day’ not to drink.

Understand this approach won’t work for everyone – some people just can’t grasp it. But if you are searching for a positive way to quit your habit, instead of a negative – give this a shot. Read The Secret. Learn about the law from the attraction. Develop the habits and get yourself into the mindset of a non-drinker. This takes time, hard work, and a drastic change in your mindset. But I believe – to my core – that the work you do from this perspective, which is improving your mindset to look for positivity instead of negativity, will drastically not only change your drinking habits but change your life.

I know it did for me.

Thank you, Oprah.

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This your last chance. After this there is no turning back. You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. Remember, all I’m offering is the truth. Nothing more.

This is how you get when you start questioning your sobriety, what alcohol does to you, how it affects your life, and what it takes away from you. Most people, when faced with this choice, choose the blue pill – the story ends. They keep going down the same path.

To them – alcohol is fine. There isn’t a problem. They never drive drunk. They don’t get DUIs. They don’t yell at their kids or beat their wives in a drunken rage. Their hands don’t shake. They don’t worry about the effects of the hangover. This is life – everyone drinks – and they aren’t going to change.

But once you start questioning – once you take the red pill – everything changes. And you don’t have to hit rock bottom to do that point.

In life – you should question everything. Literally everything. You should take inventory of why you do the things that you do, and ensure that they are ADDING to your life, and not taking away. This is exactly where I started my journey to kick the alcohol habit.

I have never driven drunk. I don’t have a DUI on my record. I don’t yell at my kids or beat my wife. I never have had shakes. I used to not worry about the hangover – just catch the hair of the dog and be good! It was life – drinking was social – and I wasn’t going to change.

But as I went on a personal development journey to solve other issues in my life, I started questioning the habits I was doing. I took the red pill. I was in the rabbit hole and I wanted to see how deep it goes.

And that shit goes DEEP.

When you start down the journey, you realize just how addicted you are – and that is scary. You realize that most of your problems in your stem from ONE THING – the alcohol. You realize that media pushes the glories of drinking down our throat (literally), praising the beautiful elixir for exuberant stories, great love-making, unforgettable memories, and social memories that last forever. You realize that everyone around you is enamored with alcohol. Want to catch up with someone? Hit a happy hour. Golfing with the boys? Boys be buzzin’. Long day? Wine down a bit. Airport? Who cares what time it is – it’s vacation!

And this all is socially acceptable. Yet when you realize ALL the effects that alcohol has on your – you’d wonder why you keep ingesting it.

And while I plan to focus on the science behind each and every aspect that I know of on what booze does to your system – this post is meant to tell you to take the red pill. Question everything. See if this is something that is truly benefiting you.

Look – quitting is hard. Alcohol is an addictive substance that not many people understand trying to quit. If someone wants to quit heroin, people want to help. Hell – if someone wants to quit smoking, people are supported in you can do this attitude. You take 30 days off for Dry January? People call you on Feb 1 asking if you are drinking again.

I don’t care where you are on your journey to quit. You could have a mild headache from the bottle of wine last night thinking ‘what am I doing, or you could be reading this from an ER bed after a binge session wondering ‘what am I doing. That is the start – no matter where you are at on the continuum. Do you have to ask yourself ‘what am I doing? Is this benefiting me? Why do I do this to myself again and again? Is there a better way? Then do the work.

Yes – I am acutely aware that quitting alcohol takes WAY more than answering those questions. While I do think spontaneous sobriety is possible, that is far and few. Everyone’s journey is going to be different because everyone is at different places in their relationship with the drug (and yes – I will call it a drug).

But no matter where you are at, you have to be willing to take that red pill. You have to be willing to run down that rabbit hole. You have to me ready for the uncomfortable truths that no one is telling you – and most people don’t understand.

But that red pill is SO LIBERATING.

So take the red pill. Your future self will thank you.

The post Red Pill or Blue Pill? appeared first on Fuck You Alcohol.

Alcohol is an addictive substances that will kill you slowly. May not be today. May not be tomorrow. But bit by bit, it will start taking things from you – small at first – but little by little it grows. And soon – it starts taking you.

There is no way around it. The best thing you can do if you struggle with alcohol is to stop. There is no benefit arising from having a drink.

And you hitting this site – shows you have hit the first step: Making the decision to quit and/or cut back.

Quitting isn’t overnight. I mean think how long you have been developing the habit of drinking – you think you are just going to say adios and be done? I believe it can happen – but for most, it is going to take a long journey to overcome the obstacles that are constantly in the way of life.

But the decision has to be made. You are not going to quit if you don’t think alcohol isn’t affecting your life. You are not going to quit if you think that alcohol in moderation is good for your heart. You are not going to quit if you think that life is better with the bottle.

There just isn’t a way through that path.

It isn’t until you start getting curious about what this poison is doing to your body, looking at options, questioning your habits, and taking a closer look at your alcohol intake and triggers.

There is more than 1 way to try to stop.

Some try to go cold turkey. Some go to rehab. Some use willpower. Some use a higher power. Some use classes. Some use doctors. Some use books. Some use courses.

I am not going to sit here and tell you the one way that will cure you. Sadly – you are the only one who can go on this journey to find it.

But what I can tell you is it is possible. And you – by reading this post – have already taken that first step of realizing that something has to change.

Welcome to day 1.

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